Tag Archives: help

Babies first..trip to A&E.

I noticed as I woke a little dried blood on the bed sheet, this had come from Eleanor’s ear which has also specks of blood dried up. Worried by this, I cleaned her up and kept my eye for any odd behaviour and warning signs of infections.

Eleanor has lately grown an obsession with tugging and piking at her ears, more noticeably when she is tired or having trouble with her teeth. I think she uses this as a comforting mechanism. I figured that in her sleep she must have caught herself and given a good scratch with her nails leaving a little damage behind. I wasn’t aware there was an ear infection brewing, and rapidly.

At lunch time, Euan came home for lunch as usual and was having his cuddle with Eleanor before heading back out when he passed comment that her ear was smelly and raw looking. Upon inspection, I began to panic that there was something serious under lying and that a minor irritation wasn’t just the issue. How I hadn’t noticed, I in the few hours from waking to lunch, I don’t know. Eleanor’s ear was raw red, pussy and definitely infected. There no mistaken the smell of an infection.

I called the doctor and got an appointment for the following afternoon and was advised to clear up her ear with sterile salt water regularly. Happy with this advice, I done so and I done so as best as I could. As best as I could with a wriggly six month old anyway. I was happy that this was going to settle this issue and ease of discomfort until the following day, however come 8PM after a wee trip out, her ear was progressively worse and smelling very angry, looking very unhappy.

Poor baby was having trouble, you could tell she wasn’t feeling right, irritable, crying for what seemed to reason and refusing food. We decided to take further action and call the late night doctor, got booked in and headed off soon after to the emergency department. Upon arrival, we were told to head to the fracture clinic..now,a young couple with a crying baby heading to the fracture clinic, passing a room full of waiting patients never looks good, does it?

I actually felt as though our every moved was being scrutinised by unaware individuals as we passed. Needless to say, I kept my head down. Low profile and all that. The wait wasn’t too long and Eleanor sat on our knees and had a wee play, good as gold really. You wouldn’t have thought it by the cries coming from her in the car but she surpassed expectations.

The doctor had a check of all her crucial stats and inspected her ears. Low and behold, an ear Infection.. Perhaps a burst ear drum but too hard to know with being unable to see far down the canal and Eleanor being so small. We were given a dose of amxocillin for a course of six days to clear up the infection and advised to see the Gp after this time for a check over to get the all clear. With this being her ears, I’d not like to risk lasting damage and will call first thing tomorrow to arrange for a check up. My poor baby.

It seems to be one thing after another for her right now and with being so tiny, so helpless, I really feel all of her pain only I wish I could take it away and have her as comfortable as possible at all times. Teething, colds, coughs, rashes with sensitive skin, ear aches…you name it. Man, I never thought a baby could suffer from so much in one spell. I was made aware that breastfeeding would help to eliminate colds/coughs etc and aid the immune system for both Mum and baby but this is not the case with us. We seem to pass back and forth colds and all sorts. I just wish for my baby to get a break!

It breaks my heart to see her so unhappy and unwell. It truly is the most horrible thing to see someone you love so deeply in pain and distress. Thigh she takes it like a trooper and still smiles throughout the tears, it just makes me so upset. I only wish for her a speedy recovery and hopefully some lasting relief, a break from all of the growing pains, the teething, the colds. You name it.

Motherhood really is more than just nursing a sleeping baby and changing nappies. Each day is so complex and different from the next, you dint know what is around the corner and babies moods can change in an instant. As Eleanor grows, I find there is so many complications that growth brings. The spurts, the sleep regression, teething, general unwellness, issues with sensitivity, all things that you do not really prepare for or fully expect when you bring home your newborn on those first days. It’s not all black and white as I am learning and Motherhood is challenging, it is testing and it is powerful.

I’ve never known a love like this and the want for a better life for this little lady. Here’s to a fast recovery, I’m off to sneak her some cuddles as she rests before hitting the hay myself. I’m sure I won’t sleep for worry and checking on her but I’ll give it a try. Tomorrow is a new day and with that I’m hopeful it can be a better day and I will see my baby happy once again.

What was your first experience with a trip to accident and emergency with your babe? Has anyone had trouble with ear infections in children?

Goodnight, Keren.

Coping with acid reflux and colic. How do I help my baby through this helpless phase?


For some time now, I have discovered that Eleanor had developed reflux. This began as silent probably at three weeks old and was quite difficult to diagnose. However by eight weeks old this soon developed into a more serious form of acid reflux where during and after feeds she would swallow relentlessly and become rather sick and thrash herself around in pain. This would be followed by comfort feeding which only added to the sickness and the pain.

A lose, lose situation you could say. One that there is very little coping mechanisms to help get you through.

Reflux is something which I’m sure no parent wants to see their baby experience and something that no parent actively wants to go through. The long days, the sleepless nights, the worry and the stress. Reflux is horrible yet it is simply passed off by health care professionals and as a parent you are told that it is a phase and that it will pass.

I was informed that with breastfeeding and burping often during feeds this can eliminate the issue, to feed little and often and to keep baby upright. Some ideas that would perhaps help to eliminate the issue and clear the reflux.

I have worked a lot on focusing with each of these methods. My baby is breastfed and has been from the get go. I keep her upright as often as I can and keep her upright as she feeds most of the time, I burp her religiously and most of all, I try to prevent her from over feeding. Not always an easy task to take baby away from the breast when she uses it as a source of comfort. Breast or no breast, be certain that she will cry. and cry. and cry.


Reflux and colic may just be a phase but when your baby is experiencing that phase and the troubles that go alongside it’s more than just a phase. It becomes so much more. No matter how common this may be, it’s horrible to watch your otherwise happy baby girl succumb to the discomfort and cry on repeat as she thrashes around and throws her arms all over. Grabbing and scratching.

The pain, the sickness, being unsettled and unable to rest easy, it’s not just a phase, it is everyday life and the pain it brings with it is real. It can be a struggle to cope with, especially on an extremely bad day. Reflux can affect everyone in the household. A few hours of a crying spell and baby wriggling around in discomfort, I tell you, It feels more like a lifetime and that it will never pass.

At first when the reflux was not so bad, we began to try infacol to help settle Eleanor, this alongside a good tummy massage would seem to aid her digestion and chill her out.

We began massage classes from ten days old and worked with techniques that help with colic and reflux in babies which has been helpful and beneficial for our family and my baby girl but there is only so much massaging that you can do and this doesn’t escape the underlying problems. She would settle to begin with but it would never last and after a few weeks of the infacol and massages, we decided to move on to something which I had heard worked miracles for other parents. Gripe water.

Gripe water is a herbal supplement which contains dill seed oil and can be taken from the age of four weeks old in babies, administered up to six times in a twenty four hour period to help relieve wind, colic and teething pains.

I believe that the water did help and it certainly allowed Eleanor to pass wind and burp well which did allow her to settle and get periods of a good sleep without much disturbance. However, once again, with a few weeks of trying this, of using gripe water the issue became noticeably worse and sickness was becoming more and more recurrent. We asked a local pharmacy if there was anything that we could use to give her but they did not provide much information and we were told that we could not give Gaviscon until Eleanor was one year of age. We simply had to go to the GP, who had already written reflux off as just a phase.

Eleanor was in even more distress and wouldn’t even lay down for a nap, if she napped she was interrupted by the discomfort of the reflux and would let out continuous small cries and whines as she slept. Arms would still be getting thrown about and she would try to wriggle her way to a better position that would provide more comfort. Eleanor cannot be laid flat or she will cry until picked up. I’ve found that she has to be kept upright and even having her flat in her Pram is a no go.

I’ve switched from using the Pram to get around with to a three way baby carrier that I slot her into and carry her on my chest as I explore the outside world. She seems to get relief from being kept upright and will eventually settle in this way, it must be soothing for her. If I don’t have the carrier strapped up, I tend to walk around the home with her in my arms and talking any sort of rubbish until she falls asleep and I can put her down.

This does mean that between breastfeeding and the unsettling, I have Eleanor attached to me almost 24/7. This can become extremely exhaustive and does take its toll. I do miss having some free time and having a little freedom but have come to terms with the fact that for now, this is how things are and that free time, me time is not to be taken for granted. Even catching a cup of coffee for five minutes before she begins to fuss is precious.

The past two weeks, reflux has become a very big problem and the sickness comes during and after feeds alongside the thrashing around and the crying. Or screaming rather. This has been horrible to witness and being so helpless there is little that I’ve found myself and Euan could do as parents. Sure, we walk around and talk with her to try to bring a sense of calmness. We massage her tummy until our hands are about numb and I allow her to comfort feed providing it helps to soothe her but really, there is no quick fix and nothing takes away the discomfort that she is victim to. I feel that reflux has robbed us of a happy little baby girl, she cannot be happy or even settle for any period of time as reflux causes too much distress. To watch her hurting can be overwhelming and induce my own tears.

Of course come years, she will not remember this time and how she felt or suffered but I certainly won’t forget and just because she will have no memory of this, does not make it acceptable to leave untreated and wait for the phase to pass.

With this notion and the sickness in full swing, I got onto the GP again and have been prescribed Ranitidine to administer to Eleanor. A medication that is used for intestional issues and stomach ulcers. This is also used to help adults as well as babies and infants. Ranitidine is delivered three times per day and will hopefully offer relief and long lasting results. I believe that once given the time to get into her system and kick start it’s work this should provide relief within an hour of each administration. I’m going to remain hopeful that this will help.

I’d do anything to have her out of this discomfort and allow my baby to settle. To be able to enjoy this time as a new family of three without the stress and the pain of reflux. To be able to get to know my baby girl properly, and to see her smile more often would mean so much for us as a family.

Right now, when I catch a spell of smiles it could bring me to tears, all too often I am used to seeing my baby grimace from pain and scowl. I want more baby smiles from my sweet girl and less tears. I don’t want her to have the discomfort of reflux and I want to be able to begin to form some routine and build on good habits to develop over time.

With colic and reflux, there is no routine. You simply have to go with what works in the moment and what gives relief of crying fast. I’m looking forward to winning back a little free time, some time where I don’t have Eleanor attached to me constantly, at least not while she cries helplessly. I’m hoping for us all to try and catch good sleep for the first time in a long time and I’m looking forward to moving on from this spell of colic and making happy memories as a family that we can look back on and enjoy. I want my baby and my family to be done with this horrible “phase” and to move on with nothing but joy.

If you have had a similar experience or are experiencing the same with your baby, please, share your thoughts. Share with me your tips and tricks. Is there anything that worked for you specifically and your baby? Do you have any suggestions that I can try with Eleanor? I’d love to hear your feedback and I’ll look to take on board any help that I can get for my baby.

Lots of love x

From breast to bottle. My baby can’t bottle feed to save her life.

The time has come where my baby is now seven weeks old. I am over having her feeding from my breast all day and through the course of a whole night. I am ready to have a little bit of freedom back. Some me time again, as far as that goes as a new Mother.

With a few events coming up, the festive season approaching there will inevitably be occasions where I might just fancy that glass of wine. Hell, after a long and trying day where my patience is pushed to the limits, I’m ready for a good glass of red.

I have began to express my breast milk. I use the medela swing electric pump, it may have cost me a small fortune but if it allows a little time and freedom back into my life, it’s a small price to pay. Maybe now, I can hoover and get the household tasks completed without having Eleanor feeding on me at the same time. Or perhaps I can sit down and eat meals with both hands once again. Rather than trying to eat with one hand whilst holding Eleanor in the other, all while spilling whatever I am eating down her front.

I have found that expressing is going great so far. The only issue is finding the time to express but when I catch a quick half hour I, go for it. I tend not to over do it and stick to five ounces at the most which I share between two bottles. I have tied feeding her just an ounce but I have one hungry little lady and this was simply not enough. Especially as she comfort feeds.

Since introducing a bottle into our routine – or lack of routine that the problem is, Eleanor will not feed from the bottle. Hungry and angry she becomes too fiesty and will not settle down for a bottle.

It is near impossible and heart breaking to watch as I try force her to take the bottle as she rages on and has tears rolling. She gets too stressed. When I finally get the bottle to her, she cannot or will not feed from it. Milk from the bottle runs down her neck and spills over her bib and baby grow. I don’t know if she even gets the taste of milk from the bottle. What I do know is, is that the milk running down to her neck makes for one smelly little lady.

I have been trying and struggling to working on bottle feeding, as she will have to know how to feed from a bottle, it’s quite important. Not so much right now but as I will be returning to work, I cannot feed her around the clock all of the time and it is important that she can feed from the bottle and be fed by others. It will too be good for her own sake and building her independence. Right now, she depends on me.

It takes much patience and can be extremely testing when she screams demanding her fill of milk yet shakes off the bottle and refuses to feed. All while thrashing around and trying to gef to my breast. Wether she knows how to or not, I don’t know but I’m starting to lose the will to live with the bottle battle. It is draining for all of us and I get upset when I see her so upset. I know it’s a case of persevering and tough love but if I can find a method to help and make feeding less of a struggle, I’ll take it!

We are trying to have Dad do the bottle feeds, she won’t smell the milk from him and it is a good excuse for some Father and Daughter bonding, the struggle is still there though. Trying to feed from Dad or anyone else for that matter is still mostly a losing battle and by the time she settles to take the bottle, she has tired herself out and is falling asleep, missing out on her feed.

I’m currently using Avent and Tommee Tippee bottles, these hold just five ounces at a max and are nice and small. Easy to hold onto. I don’t know if the teet on these is not right for Eleanor and her demands. Especially as she is coming from the breast as her only feeding method.

Is there another bottle that would suit better? I’ve trolled online for answers to which there are plenty. There is so much information available online it is almost overwhelming and hard to know what is the right option for myself and Eleanor is. I think it will a good few rounds of swapping bottles and brands but if I can find the right brand and the right bottle to suit, we will get there and it will become second nature.

I’m on the hunt for tips and advice from mums who have been through the same or may even be going through this now. What bottles are you using? What tips can you offer to this new mum?

My baby cannot feed from a bottle to save her life and the battle that we have each day when I try to feed her from the bottle can get too much. I am ashamed that at times I do have to give in and give her what she wants – the boob. I end up disappointed with myself but when you are tired, frustrated, and feel you are getting nowhere, sometimes the only road is the easy road.

Does anyone have any idea or experience of this and can they suggest a specific method? A certain bottle to make for easy feeding times? Do I persevere and wait for time to take its toll, hoping that time will help the issue, wait for Eleanor to grow a little and have a better feeding ability?

Will I be breastfeeding my baby until she is twenty years old? Trust me, at times it feels this way.


The things I wish my midwife had told me.



Hindsight is a wonderful thing, isn’t it? During the course of my pregnancy, I was always so blind sighted by the concept of holding my baby that I didn’t really explore or look into what life might be like post baby and what babies actually do.

We all know how it goes; babies, eat, sleep and poop. I was naive to assume as much and to never have questioned what goes on in between or even during these stages in the day. I didn’t bother to think about what babies do when they are awake, how they act and what can trigger them to act in a particular way. Why does a baby cry?

I feel that I was misled and misinformed by the midwives and ante natal classes. I was only ever told of the positive side to motherhood, breastfeeding and babies. Never the negatives. I was silly to have been so naive and not ask more questions or have done more research into life with a newborn. After all, it is a life changing experience and I wish I paid more attention to this and given post birth some thought. I had wanted my baby so bad that I overlooked some of the most important factors surrounding becoming a first time parent. I had unknowingly set myself up for failure.

There is a lot more to babies than eating, sleeping and pooping. It is not as simple as it can be made to seem and a lot more delicate.

 What happens when all your baby wants is to be held and will not allow to be put down? What happens when your baby is awake all night, crying in discomfort with colic? Nothing that you try to do will help and the crying only intensifies. What then?

21911266_175156759703314_3618031242710089728_n What happens when your baby gains the benefits of breastfeeding but you, as the Mother are left feeling drained and lifeless from hours of cluster or comfort feeding? Breastfeeding is said to help a Mother share a strong bond with baby, however I was not aware nor made aware about issues that develop such as cluster feeding. The whole aspect of bonding is overlooked in my experience and I don’t feel nursing my baby builds a bond, nursing simply intensities how tired I am. I feel like I am not yet a Mother, I am a feeding mechanism with a baby attached to me almost 24/7.


Nobody warned me of the darker side to parenthood or what happens come dark. There is no routine and there will not be for a long time. Why are parents so misinformed about issues such as colic? Why are the benefits of breastfeeding pushed at new mums yet the reality of this nursing method is missed out?

Perhaps it is down to the parents to do their own research pre baby. Perhaps health care professionals should be more open with the reality of life with a newborn and not lead parents into a false pretense. I hadn’t even heard of colic prior to this. I have discovered just how common it can be among newborns and I feel a little upset that something so common does seem to be overlooked and not spoken of during a woman’s pregnancy.

21819793_351033521976984_1886224562660573184_n We are currently involved in a six week baby massage class where we learn routines and techniques to massage Eleanor. An element of the class covers dealing with colic and wind build up, methods to help subside this are taught and seem to be very beneficial and relaxing. It certainly chills Eleanor out but is in no way the answer to her colic nor a long term solution.

I feel that had I been given information about colic or told the disadvantages of breastfeeding I could have prepared myself for the impact each would have and the extent of the toll that such issues can and do take. No new parent wants to be nursing their baby for hours through the night to help soothe the excessive crying, unable to lay their baby down anywhere but right beside them. It is tough. 

We are told by Health care staff that colic is a phase that will pass. When? When will this phase pass? It is so easy to say yet being on the receiving end and dealing with your baby who is clearly in discomfort and struggling is not so easy. It is hard to see her struggle through. I feel so helpless during her episodes of this. Being told it will pass, is simply no use.

Life with a newborn is hard and there is so much more to it than we are led to believe. I often find myself feeling the strain of handling a baby all day both physically and emotionally, especially when she does not like to be put down. You don’t really get a break being a new parent and certainly factors such as colic and comfort feeding add to this. I only hope that come time, colic and the disadvantages of breastfeeding become more spoken of and awareness surrounding both is brought to the attention of new parents.

21690458_1415176985245146_942516790557147136_n I only wish that during my pregnancy I had done my research and asked more questions. Had I had the information which I do now, could I have prevented the colic? Could I have been in a better routine of the sorts? Would I still have chosen to breastfeed? The fact is, it is now too late to wonder what if, II can now only act on the decisions that I had made and deal with each day at a time. I hope that this is just a phase and that the colic and the crying relentlessly will pass, sooner rather than later and I can gain some Independence back.